Adventures In Parodyverse: Touring The Mansion, Part 3

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Touring The Mansion, Part 1
Touring The Mansion, Part 2

Adventures In Parodyverse - Touring The Mansion Part 3

    'Find out just what you're capable of'...Hatman's words echoed in Lara Night's mind, and weighed on her heavily. They meant so much...she had to prove his confidence in her wasn't unwarranted. To stand by his wishes, expressed and implied, but keeping herself and innocents around her safe at all times.

    In a sense, taking all the fun out of what she had to do.

    CrazySugarFreakBoy! was a few minutes behind them, and the others were busy in the damage wake of the loose giant mech...she and Hatman consisted of an 'advance team' so to speak, having to secure what they could with backup not immediately available. And they had to do it safely.

    "What's the plan?" Lara asked dutifully, expecting the Lair Legion founding member to naturally assume the leadership role. They were at a heavily armed fortress, after all, not just a simple park in the middle of Paradopolis.

    Hatman slipped a Steelers cap on his head and his skin turned a silvery metal color. "We walk right up there," he said.

    "And then what, oh fearless leader?" CSFB! asked, as he just caught up.

    There was a notable pause as Hatman thought of the perfect answer. "We improvise," he said. He looked directly at Lara. "You told us you could shield yourself. I'm going to need you to use that to its maximum potential. Really concentrate. I don't want you hurt."

    Lara nodded, not bothering to object this time. She knew just how dangerous the situation was and didn't want to lessen that by arguing it.

    "Let's go," Hatman said, and with that, he charged toward the gate of the compound.

---

    Visionary walked down the hallway of the Lair Mansion, on his way from the command center, were Hallie was coordinating the Lair Legion rescue effort downtown, to his quarters. Ever since that...thing took over part of his heart he felt fatigued often. He felt too proud to ask that Lara for help again, though he wished she would somehow know...because he wasn't sure she could this time.

    Just as he turned the corner to head to his quarters he nearly ran into Chiaki Bushido, known as the Psychic Samurai. "Hi," he said quickly as he tried to slink past. But he noticed that she was staring at him carefully. "Umm...Jay is out on a mission now," he tried to distract her with.

    "I know." Chiaki replied softly. "I mean to speak to you. It's a matter that is delicate, personal."

    "Okay." Visionary opened the door to his quarters and invited her in. He closed the door behind her. "You're not going to hurt me are you?"

    "No." Chiaki shook her head and sat down in one of two chairs near the door. "There is something within you," she told him quietly. "I'm not sure how to describe it...but it is an immense negative."

    "A lot of people say that." Visionary pointed out. "But I'm not really all that negative."

    "No," Chiaki shook her head. "Negative as in the darkness of Yin and Yang. A negative force. It...damages your fate. Chance favors the negative as long as it is within you."

    "Oh, really?" Visionary asked. "Maybe marrying Sarah will be good for me after all."

    Chiaki stood suddenly. "Her power over probability won't help you," she warned him. "It will bring you positive fate to balance the negative. But the negative will still occur."

    "How is that different from normal?" Visionary was confused now.

    Her eyes narrowed dangerously. "It is an unnatural entity, but as long as it exists in your natural body it must obey the laws of nature to do its bidding. It must feed. It must interact with its surroundings." She softened her voice as she added, "It must breed."

    "Breed?" He shivered, not liking the sound of that one bit.

    "It will encourage you with...certain feelings," she told him. "You will be weak to resist others' encouragement as well. It must spread to others to survive, because when it finally destroys you it will be destroyed as well."

    "Are you saying I can't have sex?" Visionary blushed with embarrassment when he realized how outraged he sounded and how loudly he said it.

    Chiaki seemed calm, not even seeming to notice his outburst. "That is not what I said, but yes, you must be careful with any kind of intimacy. Take precautions. Pay close attention to the source of your feelings." She gave him a sympathetic look as she turned to leave the room. "Just be careful," she told him as she headed through the door.

    "Wait...how did you know Sarah is--" Visionary tried to ask. But by the time he got halfway through the sentence the Psychic Samurai had already left. "That's okay," he mumbled to himself. "I needed a nap anyway."

---

    Hatman slammed into the gate at the compound as hard as he could in his metallic Steelers form. It caused the door's hinges to crumble and the door to dent but the door didn't budge. "Oww," he exclaimed.

    "We probably should have blocked the door right after the mech went through," CSFB! suggested.

    "Through," Lara mumbled to himself. "That's it!" She looked at Hatman. "I can dilute myself with energy and go right through. Then I can open the door from the other side."

    "They probably have a force field on the other side," he guessed.

    "Hmm." Lara looked at Hatman. "Good point. Maybe that's why you couldn't get through either." She paused for a moment. "You know...if you can't push--"

    "--then try pulling," Hatman finished her sentence. He switched to a Titan's cap quickly and grabbed ahold of the edge of the door just as strength went rushing through his body. The metal creaked loudly as the door, while it didn't open normally, bent in half, exposing enough of the force field below for them to see or potentially walk through.

    "My turn," Lara insisted. For a certain dramatic flair she raised one hand and pointed it at the force field as if aiming a pistol...and a bright flash ignited the air around it in an explosion of noise. She could tell it worked when the force field went down and she heard a second explosion from somewhere in the compound, where the force field generator had overloaded from a few million volts.

    "Hmm." Hatman raised an eyebrow. "You come in handy sometimes."

    "And she's sexy too," CSFB! added.

    Hatman ignored him and led the way into the compound wearing his steelers cap in case of any sort of impending attack. But as he entered through faint smoke caused by the electrical explosion there was only silence. Four giant mechs stood motionless, and there was no movement. "What happened?" he asked himself.

    CSFB! entered wearing a neon colored beanie with a propeller that was spinning at very high speed, clearing the smoke almost immediately. "Whoa!" he said, "Everyone's out cold!"

    Indeed they were, Hatman noted. There were gunmen all over the compound who were laying motionless on the ground, their weapons tossed beside them. He glanced around and noticed electrical burns on the walls near where each of the fallen men lay. "Lara," he whispered calmly, "How much voltage did you use?"

    "A whole lot," she replied. She sighed as she looked around at the damage. "I...didn't think they designed their force field so badly."

    Hatman looked at Lara, noting that her shoulders were slumped and her usual cheerful demeanor had vanished. "It happens," he replied, trying to cheer her up with a verbal pat on the back. "We can't plan for everything, Lara. It's the nature of our job."

    "I know," she whispered. "I just...wish I'd known."

    "Hey," CSFB! encouraged, "You did good. We don't have to dodge bullets this way. And they're not dead, they're just unconscious."

    "Dream makes fun of me when I screw up," Hatman pointed out, "if he's standing up for you then you have nothing to feel bad about."

    "I...don't like hurting people," Lara admitted. "I know it's necessary sometimes but...doesn't mean I have to be happy about it."

    "Lara," Dream spoke bluntly. "We don't have time to think this over now. Step over the bodies and let's keep moving."

    Hatman frowned. "What he means to say is--"

    "No need to clarify," Lara interrupted him. "I understand. Spending too much time worrying about mistakes can get us all killed."

    "Or a bunch of giant mechs can get us killed," CSFB! noted.

    And for good reason...all the mechs in the compound had just come to life.

---

    Visionary woke up a short time after his nap began, feeling groggy. He didn't quite comprehend at first the young Asian girl sitting next to him, staring at him as he awoke.

    "Liu Xi," he mumbled, "What are you doing here?"

    "Waiting patiently," Liu Xi replied. "You seemed very tired. I didn't want to wake you."

    "Okay." He took a deep breath to wake himself and then sat up. "But why are you in my room?"

    "I heard of all of your troubles," she spoke softly. "With Kerry, the Juniors, your heart, and all those charges against you."

    He sighed deeply and dropped his head back down. "And I guess you believe it like everyone else?"

    "Of course not." Liu Xi shuffled closer to him. "Because I know what it's really like...what they have accused you of."

    "Really?" Visionary sat up again, sounding concerned.

    "It's not something I choose to speak about now," she said, "But I will tell you that you have been nothing but kind to me even as I invade your personal space. I can't just allow these lies to destroy you...and I am willing to do whatever I'm able to help you."

    "It's complicated, Liu Xi--"

    "No, it's not," she interrupted him. "I don't want you to protect me and allow yourself to be harmed. If you can use my help I am offering it...and I ask you to take it."

    Visionary pondered that for a moment. "What can you do about this thing with my heart? Or about the accusations?"

    "The first...I am not yet sure," she replied. "The second...I am sure my own experience with you is evidence itself. And if that fails--" She smiled slyly. "I am very good for intimidating those trying to destroy your reputation."

    "As amusing as that would be," Visionary said, "I don't think I can do that."

    Liu Xi slid off of the bed and stood. "While sacrificing yourself for your principles may seem noble," she whispered sadly, "in the end...if you die for what you believe in you die alone." With that, she turned to leave the room.

    "I don't plan to die," Visionary told her, delaying her departure.

    "I'm happy to know you're willing to fight for your life." she replied. "Now you must remember that your happiness is worth fighting for too."


---

    "I think we'll need some help," CSFB! told Hatman as he, Lara, and the Capped Crusader clustered together for cover while all the mechs in the compound slowly came to life.

    One of them fired a missile, which detonated a safe distance away as if it had hit an invisible wall. Hatman looked at Lara, who shrugged quietly and flashed him a satisfied smile.

    "We didn't see anyone board them," Hatman began to work out. "When we came in everyone in this area was unconscious. Therefore they either already had pilots in them before we came in--"

    "Or they're being remote controlled!" CSFB! finished.

    "Or a combination of both." Hatman looked at Lara. "Can you make a lot of electrical noise? Enough to block radio frequency?"

    "Any high-voltage discharge will do that," CSFB! told her.

    "Move away from me." Lara bit her lip for a moment as Hatman and CSFB! moved away, and then she held out her hands, palms down. Blue bolts of electricity began to jump randomly between her hands and the ground...

    ...and four of the seven mechs suddenly became idle.

    "So far so good," Hatman said. "Now we only have three to fight."

    "I can't keep this up forever," Lara pointed out. "My hands are heating up...and as soon as I stop the rest of the mechs will come back to life."

    "She's right," CSFB! agreed. "We have to shut down the remote ones permanently." He thought for a moment, and then gasped. "Can't you do some kind of electric pulse to fry their electronics?"

    "I think so." She nodded. "But didn't Hat say these mechs were diesel powered?"

    "The drive system, yes," Hatman replied. "But the remote control unit is all electronic."

    Lara looked at Dream's nice, bright green digital watch and frowned. "Say goodbye to your watch," she lamented before she closed her eyes and set off a powerful yet invisible electrical pulse. The three remote controlled mechs jerked randomly once and then looked as if they'd fallen asleep. And somewhere in the compound there was the sound of another electrical explosion...

    ...and everything went dark.

    "Oops," Lara whispered. "Forgot it would put out the lights."

    Hatman calmly slipped a ConEd hat on his head, and the lights immediately came back on. There were only three large mechs left, and they seemed dazed as their control electronics were still momentarily scrambled.

    "How are we going to do this?" Lara asked. "If you have to wear that hat to keep the lights on you can't really defend yourself."

    "That's where this comes in." CSFB! held up what looked like a brightly colored plastic Yo-Yo in one hand and a can of Silly String in the other. "I don't think the last three mechs will give us any trouble. They'll be a little tied up."

    That's when the missiles fired from all three mechs. Lara gasped, and nearly screamed as she held up her arms in panic. Hatman instinctively switched to his Steelers hat, plunging the area into darkness once again, and he tried his best to shield them all with his body.

    But it was all unnecessary. When CSFB! and Hatman rose, Lara Night still maintained the energy shield she had created in a panic, even as her hands were shaking. Even though the shield's border would normally have been invisible, the heavy smoke outside, unable to penetrate the energy field, marked its perimeter clearly...

    ...and as the smoke began to thin for a moment, it was clearly evident what the volley of missiles had done. In such a contained space, all of the mechs, the fortress they were contained in, and the few armed unconscious soldiers had all been almost completely consumed in a giant fireball. The remains of the building burned fiercely around them, and they could hear distant sirens as the fire department approached.

    Without a thought Hatman slipped on a Paradopolis Fire Department hardhat and watched his clothing transform into a fireproof suit and breathing mask. "Let me out," he insisted. "I have to stop this fire."

    "I--" Lara looked at a shocked and lost-in-wonder CSFB!, and then back to Hatman. "I...don't know how...without dropping the shield entirely." She sounded serious, and looked as if she were afraid if she moved an inch or became distracted they would all be consumed by the raging fire outside.

    "Make the shield follow you," Hatman suggested. "You and CSFB! can get out of here."

    "I...don't know if I can." Her voice was still steady, but there was a hint of panic beginning to edge in as she began to worry if she would be able to continue keeping them safe.

    It was a moot point though, as the first unit of the fire department arrived moments later, blasting a high-pressure hose through the broken open front door, and sending a cascade of water over the top of the energy shield Lara had cast. It sparked furiously and dropped, just as the fire around them was snuffed out.

    CrazySugarFreakBoy! didn't wait for orders at that point. He knew Hatman wouldn't be able to resist helping to fight the fire. So he quickly lifted Lara, ignoring any objection she might have had, and rushed her clear of the remaining blaze.

    "I'm sorry," she whispered as he placed her back on her feet. "I let you both down."

    CSFB! scoffed at that. "You saved both our asses," he told her. He added in a whisper, "It's okay to be scared, Lara. You did great considering how new you are at this. You're a quick thinker."

    "Thanks, I guess." she replied with a slight smile.

    "Let me give you a tip or two," Dream continued. "Best way to forget about being scared is to distract yourself with fun stuff. Like conversation." He smirked and added, "And yes, since you're waiting for me to say it...like sex."

    Lara laughed, and Dream seemed satisfied that he managed to change her mood even for a moment. "I was kind of waiting for you to say something like that," she admitted.

    "Does it really upset you, how I keep hitting on you?" Dream asked.

    She shrugged. "I guess it's kind of annoying sometimes but...it's a little flattering too. I guess it's better than you hating me."

    "Nah, I don't hate anyone," Dream said. "Just have a few people I try not to deal with, some I like to pick on, like Epitome, cause he's a real tool."

    "I've heard that about him." She laughed again. "But I think I'll reserve judgement for when I've met him."

    "Good luck," Dream chuckled at that. "He'll probably offend you with the first words out of his mouth."

    "But so did you," Lara pointed out.

    "Hmm." CSFB! shrugged. "I guess you have a point."

---

    Lisa looked up from her desk at her Lair Legion office and saw a rather short Japanese woman with sheathed sword calmly standing in her office doorway. "Can I help you?" she asked. "If you're having legal problems I'll charge three hundred an hour, but only because I hear you're a friend of Hatman's."

    The Psychic Samurai took one step forward. "I wish Visionary's legal problems to be resolved quickly. I have been listening to Hatman and it is bringing down his morale...and most likely everyone else's as well."

    "I'm working on it as fast as I can," Lisa told her. "The wheels of justice only move so fast."

    "I understand that," Chiaki said. "I wish to...volunteer my services. All I need to know is who I need to speak to so this can be resolved. I'm sure Visionary's enemies will see my viewpoint with the proper...incentive."

    "I'm beginning like how you think." Lisa grinned mischievously. "Of course I'll have to run this by Visionary first. I have to warn you...he's reluctant to do anything too drastic even if it will save his own sorry butt."

    "Tell him this is not drastic," Chiaki replied. "I have ways of convincing people without bringing them harm."

    "I'll pass that along," Lisa said. "Though I wouldn't hold much hope if I were you."

    "I believe your lunch is here." Chiaki said. She sighed and turned to leave the office. "Perhaps I will have to convince Visionary first."

    "Good luck with that," Lisa mumbled as Chiaki left her office. Just as the Psychic Samurai predicted, the pizza guy arrived a moment later. Lunch, indeed.


TO BE CONTINUED

Post By Anime Jason Sat Jul 16, 2005 at 12:23:36 pm EDT	Subject Adventures In Parodyverse: Touring The Mansion, Part 3

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